take you back

take you back

As we’re getting more into this new year, I wanted to take some time to talk about breaking bad habits and keeping up with our resolutions. In one of Noname’s early songs she raps about breaking one of her bad habits and the urge to go back to her old ways.

“I might take you back, I’m feelin’ pretty
Eggs on the table and the stove lookin’ gritty
Itty bitty on the main line
Tryna get to Noname
Vagabond gypsy bitch, never did cocaine
Only smoked cigs, only did weed
Then quit
Wasn’t supposed to say that
Rap relax wit loud packs feelin’ laid back
Oohh how I miss that
Marijuana Smoke

So I’m having second thoughts
And I really wanna get back together
With you, if you will have me darling
I never should have let you go
Never should have let you go

Noname spends the first verse and the first chorus talking about how she recently quit smoking weed and even though she’s proud of her progress so far, the feeling of withdrawal is really starting to get to her. By the time we get to the first chorus, Noname is contemplating going back to Mary Jane and really feels that she should’ve just continued enjoying one of her favorite pastimes.

I love the way she framed the song with the personification of weed and treated it as if they were an ex or something of the sort. It was really clever and creative and it’s also relatable for those of us that are quitting back habits that felt like home. For example, one of my new year’s resolutions was to stop doing work in my bed and take the time to actually sit down at my desk or go to the library, iLab, etc. This has honestly been one of the hardest habits it’s taken me o break because my bed is just so damn comfortable but that’s literally the issue. I get so comfortable that I just don’t want to work anymore, I’d rather just stretch out and watch a movie.

“First things first I miss you
And your paper thin lips
The way I kiss you, the way you hit back
Why you gotta love me so hard
Bae, I’m already faded
All dressed up in your smoke
Favorite vacant parking spot
I sparked the bark
And lit the tree, the aftermath in after dark
Was all the love of sympathy
You feel me?”

Miss Warner takes the second verse to reminisce on the good times that she and Mary Jane had when they were together. She keeps in line with the relationship theme by comparing it to an abusive relationship (“The way you hit back/Smack/Why you gotta love me so hard”). The double entendre in these lines is more than clever but also speaks to how she feels about her relationship with weed. Although it’s fun and brings her both peace and joy, it can also interfere with life itself (“Gettin’ high like fuck tomorrow/Gettin’ high, too high like bitch you tweakin’?”) and cause other to see her in a different (usually not positive) light (“They don’t get it, they know you/They ain’t seen a pale sky/The blank road, you got close to”).

I believe it’s important to evaluate the habits in your life and categorize them as necessary, whether they’re good, bad, or just habits that you only need to keep up for the time being. Now, whichever habits end up in either category is up to you but doing a mid-year or end-of-year review for your habits is essential to making sure you’re on track with your growth and becoming the person that you want to be.

“Ooo if I could roll another with my lover man I would
Damn I would smoke you out
Ooo if I could roll another with my lover man I would
Damn I would smoke you out

I might take you back
You belong wit me
It’s been a long long time
Since I last smoked weed
I miss you if you didn’t know
Telefone can we call up Mary Jane again?”

As the song comes to a close with the bridge and the second chorus, we hear Noname possibly making the decision to break her cannabis celibacy. Now, it takes 21 days to make or break a habit and although it wasn’t mentioned, I feel like Noname was still in those 21 days when this was written.

For those of us that are still in the stage of breaking (or building) habits and need a little guidance, I have a few tips for making sure your stay on course.

  • Know your triggers
  • Get an accountability partner
  • Fine yourself for every offense (like a swear jar)
  • Change your environment
  • Give yourself rewards after each week of success
  • Remember that change doesn’t happen overnight

What are some habits you’re currently trying to break? Let me know in the comments below.


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